Tuesday, December 9, 2014

Taman Mini Indonesia Indah: A Universe of Delights!

Today I made a journey to Taman Mini Indonesia Indah, also known as BuHartoLand. Taman Mini is a massive theme park on the southern edge of Jakarta that features dozens of pavillions providing displays and performances from Indonesia's various provinces. It's a good place to go to see a lot of really neat things that are closed and/or broken! The complex sprawls over around 100 acres and is something like what you'd expect a post-apocalyptic Epcot Center to look like. Children, if you don't know what the term "post-apocalyptic" means, read or watch Cormac McCarthy's "The Road" and you'll get a pretty good idea of what I'm talking about. Anyway, today's post is dedicated to giving you a "virtual tour" of Taman Mini. Behold my photos of this wondrous place and shiver in awe! There's a lot you can say about this next picture. For example, you might suggest that the weeds growing out of the airplane are symbolic of Garuda's commitment to their posted timetable. But this scene inspired me to com up with a new slogan for Indonesia's largest airline: "Garuda...Any Landing within 5 Kilometers of an Airport is a Good One!" Hopefully an airline executive will happen across this post and decide to adopt this slogan for an international advertising campaign and my days of riding coach will be over. But seriously, anyone that knows me knows I like to poke fun at Indonesia's air carriers. I'm sure they'll get me back some day with some hilariously ironic prank, like flying the plane I happen to be riding straight into Mt. Merapi. Anyway, this plane is situated just outside the transportation museum at Taman Mini. I didn't go in, because as much as I love Indonesia, I kinda felt like a museum dedicated to transportation in this country is like putting the cart before the horse, if you get my meaning. Next on our virtual tour is the lizard museum, pictured to the left. This is another exhibit that didn't actually enter, because I figured there was no way the contents could top the actual building itself. There were pictures on the outside, though. They have all of your standard lizards...Komodo dragons, bit iguanas, chameleons, and so on. I didn't see any that I had never seen/eaten in the past, so I moved on. But the structure is pretty remarkable. This is probably the only building I've ever seen that has scales, as you can see from the closeup. The next stop is the building to the right, which we'll call "Castle Anthrax". I'm not sure which island this type of architecture is characteristic of. Definitely one I haven't visited yet. Wherever it is, though, it must be a mystical, magical, marvelous place. Around Castle Anthrax are all sorts of wonderful rides for the kiddies, and if there had been any there I'm sure they would've had a great time. This is another building I didn't go into because I was sure the lack of air conditioning would wreck the fairy-tale image the park's creators have worked so hard to create. It's pretty neat, though. I asked the people working at the ticket counter if Castle Anthrax has a grail, and they said no. After Castle Anthrax I made my way over to this next exhibit, the "Taman Konservasi Nusantara". I think this structure made a guest appearance in the 1973 classic sci-fi movie "Silent Running", which is about the last remnants of Earth's plant life being shot into space aboard special ships designed to preserve the plants for a future time when they could be brought back to re-green the Earth. The plants in the TKN here are actually being saved for some future time when they can be used to re-green Jakarta! My last stop was riding the cableway across the park back towards the parking lot. This was actually one of the most harrowing experiences of my life, but after making my peace with the Lord and drafting a quick will in my moleskine book I was ready to go. Besides, the gentleman collecting the tickets assured me that they rigorously inspected all the machinery after the last accident. Away I went into the blue yonder, suspended precariously hundreds of feet above the park. Suddenly it seemed as though the whole world (or at least the whole archipelago) came into view! And it did! I looked down to see a scale replica of all the islands of Indonesia in a large pond in the middle of the park! For me this was the most impressive part of the day, and I've included a video below for your pleasure. I apologize for the poor video quality and the lack of sound, but I hope you can get the idea of the view.